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Orson Welles in THE GLASS KEY (Radio, 1939)

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I've seen both film versions and a rare live TV production, but didn't know about this.

Steve Mertz rides again with BLAZE! THE CHRISTMAS JOURNEY

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If you’re hankerin’ for a new-fangled Old West Christmas, it’s available right this minute in The Christmas Journey, the latest Blaze! adventure by series creator Stephen Mertz.


This one has everything anyone could want in a Christmas story: Santa Claus, religion, sex, love, shootouts, goodwill towards men, bank robberies, motherly love, wild Indians and a hat tip to The Grateful Dead.


It begins with J.D. Blaze (fastest gunslinger in the West) playing Santa Claus at the insistence of his nubile wife Kate (the second fastest), and gets crazier by the minute. Next thing they know they’re on a two-horned quest, committed to catching a couple of bank robbers and rescuing an innocent boy from the hangman’s noose.


That’s when the Journey (of the title) begins, first with a stagecoach ride (complete with echoes of the John Wayne flick), then onto a train attacked by redskins (complete with a fight on the roof) and finishing in a prairie schooner (with Three Wise woMen). Along the way, we meet a large cast of quirky characters, including smart and stupid outlaw brothers, a preacher who’s lost his faith (and never gets it back) and a good-guy Injun chief named Iron Eyes.


Everyone exhibits the Christmas spirit in their own way—even the Apaches. Recognizing that the season is special to the white eyes, they deem it a bad time for shedding blood. “Well,” says one, “could we at least raise a little hell?” The answer is yes, so in attacking the train they shoot over passengers’ heads, laughing all the way.


And, this being and adult Western series, we have a deftly handled sex scene:


     Kate knew that no woman could ever tame a man like J.D.—but she could handle him in the oldest way known to the species. She consciously shifted the way she sat against the headboard. Her legs stretched out before her beneath the clinging bed sheets, parted ever so slightly.

     She smiled and said in a throaty whisper, “It sure would please this girl if her husband would oblige her this one single favor in keeping with the holiday spirit.”

     J.D. could not restrain his eyes from appraising her naked curves so clearly outlined beneath the thin sheet concealing her from the neck down. He said, “Uh, are we negotiating?”

     “Maybe we’re just celebrating Christmas early. Maybe this girl would like Santa to come down her chimney.”

     J.D. shucked his trousers. He climbed into their bed.

     He said, “Ho Ho Ho.”


The author (at right) even manages to slip in a sly bit of autobiography. This passage with Kate Blaze ruminating about southeastern Arizona comes straight from the heart:


     Kate, born in the East, had come to love this country. When it was her time, when God came looking for her, He would find her in these southernmost borderlands of the U.S. where mountain ranges—the Huachucas, the Whetstones, the Mules—were already dusted with snow above the tree line. Big sky country where a soul could breathe.

     This was her home. A land of open prairie and rugged mountains and isolated pockets of what they called civilization; small towns like Horseshoe. Beyond the town limits, beyond the mountains lush with pine and game, home of the Apache, the vistas swept clear to the distant horizon, where you could roam free. She led a free range life with J.D. and she could never again live any other way.

     One of the things Kate loved out here was the weather. She could recall snow blizzards that had hammered the desert right around Christmastime but more often the season was like today. The daytime air crisp but pleasant in the sunshine. It beat hell out of the harsh winters she’d endured growing up as a kid back east.


     J.D. Blaze sums up Blaze! The Christmas Journey with the borrowed lyric, “What a long, strange trip it’s been.” That’s true. It’s also a tribute from Mr. Mertz to the land he loves, a celebration of the Christmas spirit, and a rollicking good time. Minus the sex stuff, it would make a great TV movie. Are you listening, Hallmark Channel?


The book, or eBook, can be had HERE

What the Well-Dressed Pulp Fan is Wearing (Part 1)

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As worn (to many an admiring glance) by Yours Truly.




All available from ALTUS PRESS, HERE.

Roger Moore is SHERLOCK HOLMES IN NEW YORK (1976) with Patrick McNee, John Huston, Charlotte Rampling and more. Sheesh!

Christmas with the Beatles? Almost.

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I posted some of these Christmas songs by The Fab Four a few years back. Here are all 20 tracks, with a couple of extras thrown in. Some are more listenable than others, but they're all mighty dang interesting. My thanks to music mogul Mr. Drew Bentley for turning me on to them.

Christmas with the Stars

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This post is a re-run from a couple three years ago, but worth another look.








The Art of Adam West

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Batdog

An email from MeTV told me that Adam West, now 88, has a bunch of paintings on exhibit in an art gallery in Ketchum, Idaho. The examples here are priced between $3000 and $8500. 

Penguin

Alfred

Joker Evening Makeup

Christmas Surprise

Riddler

Liberace

The Mad Hatter

What the Well-Dressed Pulp Fan is Wearing (Part 2)


Sherlock Holmes vs. Jack the Ripper: A STUDY IN TERROR (1965)

What the Well-Dressed Pulp Fan is Wearing (Part 3)

Shadow Comics 61, 62 & 63 (1946)

The Art of Frank Hamilton (Part 1)

Dime Detective Library (Series 3) from Altus Press

Recent cool stuff from Black Dog Books

The Complete Adventures of Race Williams

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“Knights of the Open Palm”
“Three Thousand to the Good”
“The Red Peril”
“Them That Lives By Their Guns”
“Devil Cat”
“The Face Behind the Mask”
“Conceited, Maybe”
“Say It With Lead!”
“I’ll Tell the World”
“Alias Buttercup”
“Under Cover”
“South Sea Steel”
“The False Clara Burkhart”
“The Super-Devil”
“Half-Breed”
“Blind Alleys”
and three Race-free tales:
“Dolly”
“Paying an Old Debt”
“The False Burton Combs”


The Snarl of the Beast (novel)
“The Egyptian Lure”
The Hidden Hand (novel)
The Tag Murders (novel)

And many more to come. Get 'em HERE.

The Executioner in the Library

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Had a fine surprise at the county library when I saw these shiny new trade paperbacks on the New Books shelf. The covers are way less pulpy than the originals, which is too bad, but the insides are as great as ever. A Mack Bolan rampage through our public libraries is long overdue. They're available as ebooks too. Makes me want to read them again for the fifth or sixth time.


The Art of Frank Hamilton (Part 2)

Harold Lamb's Cossack Adventures

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I'm reading the adventures of Khlit & co. again. Damn, these are good!



Will Murray's KING KONG vs. TARZAN: Two Icons for Price of One

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The Lord of the Jungle has bested some mighty tough critters over the course of his long career. The King of Skull Island, meanwhile, has kicked a whole lot of dinosaur butt, in addition to whupping (at least in the American film version) a big booger called Godzilla. So when these titans finally clash, you know there will be fireworks.

And that’s exactly what we get in Will Murray’s new epic, King Kong vs.Tarzan. And how it all comes about is told so convincingly that this unlikely meeting comes to seem inevitable.

If you’ve seen the movie recently (and I’m talking the 1933 version), you may recall that an hour and twenty-four minutes into the film, after Kong is subdued by a gas bomb on Skull Island, movie producer Carl Denham says, “Why, in a few months it’ll be up in lights on Broadway: Kong! The Eighth Wonder of the World!” – and in the next scene we see the Broadway marquee, proclaiming just that.

The film leaves a slew of questions unanswered. How did they get Kong to ship? How did they restrain him on the voyage? What did the big booger eat? Could they really keep him alive for months without him destroying the ship? How did the principle humans, Captain Englehorn, First Mate Jack Driscoll and would-be starlet Ann Darrow (that’s Fay Wray to you) resist tossing the demanding and conniving Carl Denham into the ocean?

King Kong vs. Tarzan answers all those questions, and many more, including the big ones: How the heck did Kong meet up with Mr. T, what kind of hell broke loose, and who came out on top? I’m not telling you any of that stuff. You’ll want to read it for yourself.

But I’ll reveal this much: There are 455 pages full of great fun and adventure. There’s plenty of grisly action as Kong squeezes natives like grapes, munches on a hippopotamus and scarfs down oodles of crocodiles. There’s all the fury and majesty of Tarzan of the Apes, ably assisted by his trusty companions Nkima the monkey and Jad-bal-ja the Golden Lion, and his reserve corps of great apes and elephants. It all comes down a battle royale that would have been admired by both Edgar Rice Burroughs and King Kong producer Meriam C. Cooper.

One of the more intriguing characters is a very old crone named Penjaga (aka The Storyteller) who is sort of Kong’s nanny and guardian. She was introduced, I believe, in Kong, King of Skull Island, the 2004 illustrated novel conceived by this book’s cover artist, Joe DeVito, and returned in Mr. Murray’s epic Doc Savage adventure Skull Island (reviewed HERE). Since Penjaga has now made the acquaintance of both Doc and Tarzan, we know they occupy the same Murray universe. Can a meeting between those two titans be far behind?

A new film, Kong: Skull Island (featuring Tim Hiddleston, Samuel L. Jackson and John Goodman) is slated for release this year, and a remake of King Kong vs. Godzilla is planned, but Hollywood would be much wiser to bring us a screen version of King Kong vs. Tarzan. I’m thinking J.J. Abrams or Joss Whedon. And whichever guy does it, he should be sure to give Will Murray a cameo.

In the meantime, you should rush to your favorite bookseller’s website and buy this book. It’s two icons for the price of one, and a hell of a lot of fun.

You can get it from Altus Press right HERE.


Musketeers!

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This is my favorite show of the past few years, now in it's third (and reportedly final) season. Along with a rousing theme song (above), the action is peppered with humor (minus, of course, the subtitles employed in the video below).

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